Road Trip

I was on my way to visit friends when I stopped at the local hamburger emporium to grab my lunch.  On the spur of the moment, I decided to sit and eat in the restaurant, rather than use the drive-through.

When I got my order, I took a tiny table for two next to the wall. A position which put me almost shoulder-to-shoulder with a table for four, just to the right of me.

"Oh, God!!" said a 20-something woman, in the voice of one who has just witnessed a massive car accident.  She was dressed in black from tip to tail, on the last day of August.  "That must be so awful for you that neither of your families drink at all on Thanksgiving! God!! That's terrible!!"

Her male companion, sitting to her left, nodded sympathetically.

"Well, it IS pretty bad," said the pretty dark-haired woman sitting across from her.  She wore a dark blue silk blouse and a face full of makeup that looked like it was applied with extraordinary care. She dropped her voice to a conspiratorial tone. "When my husband has a beer, they think he's an alcoholic!"

"Yhea--fff!!" her husband nodded vigorously from the seat to the right of her, while wolfing down his burger.

"And, of course. he's NOT an alcoholic!" the pretty woman continued.

"Of course not!" the others agreed, wagging their heads in unison.

" I mean, maybe a glass or two of wine with dinner..."


I was chewing silently on my burger and trying to look invisible.
"Note to self," I thought.  "This guy's a serious drinker."


"Methinks the lady doth protest too much," Shakespeare said, some 500 years ago.

Why is it that we always out ourselves by vehemently denying what is most true? Like the little kid who announces, ever so loudly, that he had ABSOLUTELY NOTHING to do with that broken lamp in the living room.

"Well, you should see our family," the Woman In Black went on. "We're like...well...everybody brings...well...." she raises her voice triumphantly, "well, we just get shit-faced!"

Everyone laughed with great relief.

"HEY!" the wearer of black, said, an idea slowly dawning on her,  "maybe we could invite you to our house for Thanksgiving!

At this, the non-alcoholic husband raised his head from his burger, with what could only be described as the look of a hopeful puppy.  Big brown eyes, beseeching.

"Yeah!" she said, "we always rotate from house-to-house and we could just take our turn and invite you guys to join us!"

Problem solved, the meal ended in a chorus of happy voices as they looked ahead to the great times they'll have together this fall.