This morning, Delicate Flower was a very happy girl. Her things were packed, and tomorrow morning we were on our way to move her into the new apartment near the university.
Then, about two hours ago she got an e-mail from the young couple that heads up her College group.
It seems that, after much soul-searching and prayer, they have decided to leave the ministry and the church.
Just like that.
Earlier this month they were on a short term mission with the students, the week before last they were talking about the big plans they had for the ministry this fall, and then, today, it was over.
Now my little girl is sitting on her bed, crying herself to sleep, saying it's never going to be the same.
And, of course, it isn't.
How do I tell her she is only beginning a lifetime of changes--some good, some not so good and some that will just plain break her heart?
How we long for the status quo in our lives! I can remember times in churches and ministries where things were really, really good. I remember brothers and sisters from those days, how close we were, how I hoped we'd always be together, moving from one adventure to the next.
Then, when I least expected it, someone would leave, someone would come, something would change. And it would all be over.
I think back on a lot of those friends with a sweet kind of nostalgia. But at the time, it was terrible. And of course, that is what is happening with her.
As I get older, I realize that people move in and out of my life, but the ministry and the call never really end. They just change as God moves us into the next season.
But, of course that won't make much sense to her right now. She is grieving what she knows will never be the same.
How do you deal with changes like this? What would you tell your children?
4 comments:
Of course, I would just go and beat that couple up.
Or not.
Change is so hard!!!!
I think when you are a good, sensitive parent, you want to find teachable moments everywhere you can. You want to make sure that if your child has to go through pain they get 'the moral of the story', so that something good can come out of the experience. But there is a reason they are called 'life lessons'. Just living through them brings revelation and understanding, if the foundation is strong.
Maybe just being there is enough for now, and let God do the rest.
Just a thought.
Time to Dream: Good thoughts, all of them. It is good to think in terms of God healing her heart. He has already done some of that in the past few days. Welcome to the blogging world, BTW!
Llama Momma: Yes, you would do that, wouldn't you?! I considered it, but decided to take the high road :)
Since my child thinks concretely, I am forced to make my explanations as simple as possible. There is an enormous gap between what I would like to say, and what I do say. Sometimes I go all out, and get completely abstract on him. This meets with limited results.
God is the ultimate answer, as you said. When we tie our spiritual experiences to individuals within the body, we momentarily take our focus off the One Who binds us all together. It is understandable, given our natures.
At the risk of oversimplifying, I think every single thing we experience in our flesh is permitted in order to draw us closer to God.
Nothing can separate us from His love . . . .
I feel for your dear daughter.
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