Make it stop!!

So, last week, I was humbled by some very close friends. The Readers Digest version is that I apparently have been acting like a jerk, and one of them called me on it. After passing through the seven stages within the space of an hour-- anger, denial, etc. I finally had to face that what they were saying was true, and own up to them about it.

I hate when that happens.

The "up" side was that I have really started re-examining the way I treat people and have found myself sadly lacking in several areas. Primarily, I have got to stop making snap judgements about what people say and why. The #1 thing God keeps trying to tell me is: sit down and shut up. I have got to cut people a lot more slack and give them a chance to get a word in edgewise before I blast them with my opinions.

For the past four days, I have been trying to take this to heart, excercise better judgement, speak when spoken to, etc. and then, WHAM! Today a brand-new co-worker jumped all over me and judged ME for something I did that she thinks is wrong. Not just that, but she ran to escalate it to my boss--twice!

Did I mention I hate it when that happens?

Now I'm seeing her do what I did and all I want to do is dish it right back at her!!!! No sooner did I ask forgiveness for that other situation, than I'm straining to tell her where she can go with her criticism. A good friend of mine once said: "When we do wrong, we want people to judge us according to the New Testament, but when others do wrong we want to judge them according to Old Testament standards."

Surely the Apostle Paul knew how I feel when he cried out:

"O wretched man that I am! Who will deliver me from this body of death?"

So, tomorrow, I will pray that God will calm the storm within me and get me to work safely without biting anyone's head off. Then I pray he will get me through the day with this person, that we can talk this out reasonably and rationally and get it resolved.

I don't like people calling calling me on things and I don't like admitting when I am wrong. However, there is no other path to resolution, in or out of the Body. The only way out of this tunnel is straight through the middle.